Thursday, April 29, 2010

The Use of Memories

At times the past gets a sudden grip on me and I recall moments of spontaneous comfort or familiar satisfaction. Often, a nostalgic wave follows and I think of numerous happy experiences that I shared with people. Of large lawns full of flowers in my grandfather’s house. Of warmth and yet more plants in the school of five element acupuncture. Of sunshine streaming into rooms in Delhi and lighting up books and boxes filled with old memories.

Earlier, this would lead me to thoughts like, “I shall never see some of these people again or experience such things again,” with a feeling of regret. But now I realize that if I let the memories seep in to the depths of my spirit and wait, I get shown the next step to this encounter, disconnected though it appears in time and space. I begin to get the feeling that perhaps that it is time I drew back the curtains or brought some flowers into the house or bought a special book or something else for myself.

And then out I go, to new places, meeting new people as I embark upon this. I realize that what I gained from the past was not an emotional memory but a way of appreciating some aspect of Life itself and, in my mind, give thanks to my family and friends for this.

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